Pro: The Kenya Police have a website http://www.kenyapolice.go.ke/
Con: It was designed by someone extremely graphically challenged. Despite there being no audio, some of the pages can be heard in underground bunkers
Pro: Bottom line: Somebody somewhere is really trying. Kudos to Brigadier Ali and his merry men

However I take exception with some of the things that the police do. For example, why was the Port Manager, one Brown Ondego, flown to Nairobi upon his arrest? I know for a fact if I was arrested my ass would be brought to Nairobi in a wheelbarrow or some other such contraption.

I also wish that the Police were not under the direct control of the Internal Security Minister, at least in an executive capacity. It’s ridiculous to leave half (and quarter) witted ministers, as is amply demonstrated by the current cabinet, the power to order around the Police. It would be nice if they had complete autonomy, for example if Brigadier Ali reported directly to the president, or at least someone with more than a fleeting knowledge of the law like the Attorney General. The control of the Police cannot and should not be political otherwise the police will end up like a political weapon to oppress the people.

Also, Justice & Constitutional Affairs Minister Kiraitu Murungi yet again soiled the names of turncoats and chameleons all over the world when he dismissed Anglo Leasing as the “scandal that never was”

NARC = New Arses, Recycled Crap

PIC OF THE DAY

A certain well known personality struggled with effort to remember: “Am I the President of USA, the President of Kenya or the President of Africa?”

Can you identify yourself in this scenario?

It is 3 AM in the morning. Not a thing is stirring. Not even a mouse.

[BEEP BEEP BEEP] (Place atrocious ringtone here)
M: (Picking up almost instantly, as am light sleeper) Hello?
Ass: (Going off like a overflying jumbo jet) Hiiiiiii !
M: (Holding phone as far away from ear as possible) Yes????
Ass: (Cheerfully in a voice like thunder) It’s me!
M:Who’s me?
Ass: Me, silly! (Donkey like brays of laughter shoot down the cellular link)
M: My dear, are you aware it’s three in the morning? Who’s speaking please?
Ass: (Laughing like a set of cannons going off in Mosul) You don’t know me? GUESS WHO!
M: (In exasperation) Look, it’s very late and i have an early –
Ass: Come on! Just guess!

At this point in time in complete frustration I terminate the call, switch off the phone and fling it across the darkened room. One thing I can say about Nokias — they handle being tossed across rooms and bounced against walls very well.

My apologies to any of my lads who may have been arrested or indeed anyone who might have tried to call or text me between 3 and 9 this morning.

Calls that come at obscure hours of the morning generally have serious connotations – in addition to the afrorementioned arrest by gung ho cops, I’ve also fielded one about a friend going into labour, one concerning two gentleman attempting to unite each other with their makers and numerous dealing with some issues of the other. These I don’t mind.

What I mind are half wits calling me at three in the bloody morning with these RIDICLUS games. Can you spell EEJIT?