The setting is in Parliament buildings, Nairobi
Moody: Order, order! Are we all here?
Kituyi: (Rushing in) Sorry I’m late — oh my goodness! (Looking around) Were we to come in costume? No one told me!
Moody: Of course not! Where did you get such a ridiculous idea?
Kituyi: Then why are you dressed like one of the seven dwarves auditioning for a Western?
Moody: I’ll have you know that this is a very stylish dress
Kagwe: (Sotto Voice) For a smurf!
Ngilu: Gentlemen, please! Can we get on with the meeting?!
Moody: That’s right.
Koigi: Mr President sir, can you open the meeting?
Kibaki: Zzzzz!
Koigi: Mr President?
Nyachae: Clearly you’re new around here and don’t know how things work. His Excellency has been to the London School of Economics, and clearly this is how he was taught to chair meetings! Don’t you know anything?
Koigi: (Blushing) My apologies.
Moody: Now, are we all here?
Karua: We have a seating problem. Apparently this room was only planned for 20 ministers and we are over 80 — we need some more seats
Tuju: Well, we had bouncing castles and stuff set up in parliament grounds yesterday. We can use the tables and chairs that were used for our tea party — I mean, the children’s tea party
Kituyi: Yes, you seemed to enjoy playing house rather a lot
Tuju: (Defensively) I was just getting into the spirit with the children!
Kirwa: What children? There were no children!
Moody: Gentlemen! Let’s have the play chairs brought in then. Some of us are having problems as it is getting onto the chairs we have here!
Mwiraria: (Voice coming from under the table) I heard that!
Moody: Now, are we all seated? Good. Kamanda, can you stop eating Koigi’s dog biscuits!
Kamanda: (Mouth full) Am not!
Koigi: Waaa!!!!
Ngilu: There there!
Kituyi: Please, can we proceed!!!
Moody: We’ll open with a word of prayer
Kombo: (Modestly) If I may …
{Chorus of voices} Oh HELL no!
Kombo: (Surprised) What’s the problem? Dialogue is the answer. We must sit down at the table and dialogue.
Kituyi: No offence, but the last time you led the prayer every last statue in parliament came down from it’s perch and stretched itself out to sleep. Birds migrating south for the winter that were flying over parliament came to roost and have yet to wake up. You have this way of putting things to sleep when you talk…