tHiNkEr’S rOoM

Cricket is one of those games I personally don’t give a flying rat’s ass about. Really. The word ‘runs’ brings to mind loud and violently explosive activity from your Southern Border while seated primly on the white throne. I have no idea whether there are unders to complement the overs. I can’t think of a more doofusy game than one that breaks for the day and comes back tomorrow.

Many friends have bravely tried and failed to explain to me the workings of the game. We seldom get past the doofus looking running and bowling, and the antics of the gentleman attempting to bat, moving in a manner that suggests any sudden movement will cause a totally different set of runs to manifest themselves in the batsman’s trousers.

My attempts to replace ‘boring’ in my vocabulary with ‘cricket’ have been largely unsuccessful, but I am nothing if not optimistic.

However, cricket has suddenly become interesting, now that there are intrigues like corruption, gambling and murder. Ladies and gentlemen, we have an Agatha Christie mystery in the making. Consider that we have:

1. An exotic location (Jamaica)
2. Police officers with a fascinating accent (Jamaican police)
3. An eccentric elderly man (the Pakistani team’s cricket coach)
4. A dead body (see above) found in a hotel room
5. Lots of suspects with motive

Nothing can make cricket as interesting!

AOB

Resist the temptation to try and pitch to me the goodness of cricket. It won’t work. Really.

I WISH OF THE DAY

Oh if the doofuses we call our leaders could display such selflessness!

WTF OF THE DAY

Apparently people who live in cooler climates, like Geroge Bush, have bigger brains than those of us who live in warmer climates. Uh huh!

The Game & Kanye West - Wouldn’t Get Far

Wahey! (For some reason shades of Beano come to mind), Ory, Myself and Mzalendo are on the BBC!

Although I find it a bit of a shame that such locally brewed initiatives never attract the attention of the local media. And for all those irate people demanding to see more “stuff”, my friends, the meat and potatoes are not on the home page. They are here, here, here and soon, here

Corinne Bailey Rae - Like A Star

Politics

Now that the ODM leading lights are in London, it would be good if the NARC-K big-wigs set off for Washington. We, the people, and the climate, could do without the hot air. Really.

Religion

I am giving serious thought to giving up Lent for Lent

Education

I for one am very bitter that while I had to find the square root of 0.02323434545 using green log tables and a ruler, my brother who sat for the exams last year used a green Casio that could even draw graphs.

Radio

It seems that any doofus can and does become a radio presenter. My friend K bitterly asks me why she, and I quote,

… pissed away 4 years of my life studying journalism and mass communication and now all it takes to become a radio presenter is to release an atrocious song on radio and be labeled a ‘celeb’ by weekly local rags written and edited by half wits like the ‘Pulse’ and ‘Buzz’

Coincidences

Having a minister called Kimunya, a permanent secretary called Kinyua, an Assistant Minister called Kenneth (from Gatanga), a central bank governor called Ndungu, a Capital Markets Authority boss called Waruingi, and a Revenue Authority Commissioner General called Waweru, it becomes very convenient for the Finance Ministry as a whole to conduct its meetings in Kikuyu over a light snack of nduma. This I am sure is a coincidence. let us graph the status quo:

Carpets

Oh if the carpets at the Nation Media Center could talk!

Economy

According to the Government, the economy grew by 6%. But what they don’t tell you is where the money went.

Allow me:

Presidential Opinion

President Kibaki thinks very little of his people. Very little indeed

John Mayer - Gravity