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Odds & Ends

Posted April 28th, 2008 in R&R by M

My struggle to be”significant and articulate” continues.

Paying Tax

My sympathies are with Mr. Wesley Snipes. After spending the better part of 3 years trying to keep the taxman off his assets he will be spending the next three trying to keep the ax man off his ass. Now let’s see if just like every other rich white celebrity, he’ll be on his merry way after a couple of days after a slap on the wrist. Somehow … I don’t think so. Blade will now have mundane things like dropped soap becoming a lot less mundane.

Merus Hoyee

Looks like Kiraitu Murungi and the Njuri Ncheke must be doing something right for the Meru Community. I was amazed to see this ad on my gmail

gmail

My Man Wally

I don’t read Dilbert for Dilbert. Wally is just the guy!

stupid

The Age Of Innocence

30 years ago this comic panel would not have raised any eyebrows

desperado

Barber Shop

I earlier today cut my hair. This may seem fairly mundane to you but it is a big deal to me because the last time I cut my hair was two presidents and a prime minister, one decade and 3 elections ago, in the last millennium. Yes sir, I last sat in a barber’s seat in 1997. Vox populi has been split between disbelief and mirth, weighted heavily in the direction of the latter. I must confess since the haircut to feeling a tad lethargic.

Fuel

fuel

I’m thinking of getting a nice 21 speed mountain bike. This is Kenol Koinange Street. Kenol, BTW, consistently have the highest fuel prices in Nairobi, the greedy doofi. Only gunpoint can inspire me to fuel at a Kenol/Kobil

Bummer

Like Midnight Mugithi I find the Hummer a particularly ugly monstrosity that only a mother could love. The other day I found myself driving behind one of those eyesores. The reaction from folks can only be accurately described in film

hummer

Driving

I came across this driving school the other day while en route to visit the missus. So fascinated was I by the sign I clean missed the turnoff. It certainly looks like an interesting establishment. If only MPs would pay a visit!

driving 

Groan Of The Day

Religious women have no business making coffee. The bible clearly says Hebrews.

29 Responses so far.

  1. 31337 says:

    That desperado better not be coming in the back door Made my afternoon it did. :-D

  2. Chrenyan says:

    Be honest, how long did the haircut take?

    Well … let’s just say I took an East African …

    And Mr Snipes himself looks like he is borrowing a leaf from your book!

    Can’t fault a man for his strategy. Files in cake doesn’t seem to work any more
  3. Kirima says:

    LOL kwani which Meru’s have you been talking about marriage to in your inbox for adsense to target you with that ad :-)
    I have several people who I would like to send to that driving school.
    Careful now that you have exposed your previously protected scalp to 21st century cosmic rays you either require a hat or sunscreen at least.

  4. Ameru Mugeni! That ad cant be for real!

    Oh it’s reall all right! I wish i’d visited the link!

    KRA have been chasing for some back taxes from a job I quit in 1994 and my salary was 11k! Will I do time… I hope not with the warders on strike.. I feel bad for Mr. Snipes and hope they release him fast.

    KRA is notorious like its sister organization KACC for going after small potateoes. Next time steal billions

    You had dreads all that time or was it an Afro?

    Afro all the way. Memories, memories
  5. udi says:

    LMAO @ groan of the day.

    He he he! Brilliant isn’t it?
  6. acolyte says:

    Well the kind of prison tax offenders go to are medium to low level security, so dropping the soap isn’t a big issue for Mr Snipes but yes he is going to miss Hollywood!

    You never know, you never know

    That jibe about the back door really cracked me up! The cost of petrol is insane! I cosign on your decision to get a mountain bike! I myself am considering joining the bus crowd too! Yes our MPs need to style up soonest!

    Once ngata gets to 100 bob mountain bike for me.
  7. donworry says:

    It’s a hard life for A-list celebs. If they don’t have a good accountant they mess up their taxes, if they have a good accountant they get ripped off.

    Perhaps anyone going into entertainment industry should invest in a short accountancy course.Guess what roles Mr Snipes will be cast in upon his return?

    Mr. Snipes I feel sure will be offered a position on the cast of Oz. That i think would be most appropriate!

    They’re squeezing us dry with all these price increases

  8. I says:

    Mr. Snipes will have to do his time. only A list celebs do hrs in time.. But, if he got a DUI, he might have the time reduced for a total of 89hrs of time..

    M, why after all those years did you cut your hair?

  9. toiyoi says:

    if she wooMan, HeBrews

  10. To me that consequence for not filing tax returns seems about disproportionate. Though now I know I have ignorant friends because a friend of mine told me that apparently there is a movie that proves that paying taxes in the States isn’t actually legal.
    That gay desperado thing, surely, must have at least struck some people as driving up the wrong street….funny though.
    Anyway I am off to marry myself a Meru woman, thanks for the adwords tip.

  11. Thomas says:

    YOU
    CUT
    YOUR
    HAIR?

    I know a human and canine that MIGHT take offense at that, and not on the offensive, or is it defensive? Oh, Dear :D

  12. Wathii FM says:

    You look great in that new hair cut..didn’t know your height was hidden in there :D

  13. Midnight says:

    I think wesley snipes is gonna to find it very difficult to get out early. The IRS folks are less flexible than the securities and exchange commission, and the laws are such that the IRS has quasi-extra-judicial powers which makes appeals difficult. Though i suspect he may work out a deal to pay a steep fine, and get early parole.

    (Will probably have to sell his collection of Hummers to do that :) )

  14. edge.of.sanity says:

    SENTENCE CUT SHORT:
    Blade/Wesley Snipes will be out sooner than you or I would if we were to similarly transgress against the almighty IRS. Hang in there Wes, and hurry up with Blade IV, will you!?

    STILL AS CERTAIN AS DEATH:
    Huh? Illegal to pay taxes in the U.S.? I definitely want to see that movie and the follow logic behind that ridiculous claim.

    DILBERT: Always smart and hilarious!

    THE GAY DESPERADO:
    …cheerily broke the back door facing the mountain when he came for the payoff…[it doesn't have to make sense - the keywords have been craftily worked in] ;)

    HAIR CUTS:
    ???? I didn’t cut mine… :)

    HUMMER vs 21 Speed vs P50:
    I don’t particularly like the H2/H3 i.e. the civilian Hummer, but the military vehicle is quite a machine and a worthy replacement for the classic Jeep.

    With the current fuel prices, however, the P50 would be the cheapest ideal mode of transportation next to walking.

    STYLE UP:
    Say no more

    HeBrews:
    Somebody had to eventually see that one – Not I, though.

  15. Nakeel says:

    I must see the new look yes I have to. What its gone? Cant believe.
    Snipes will stay there till the last second.

  16. Well, by now you know there are certain..uh… advantages to having a scalp that can, ahem, be ‘felt’. LOL. 19 now notwithstanding :-))

    :-* for that, you know, and everything else…

    @ Naks…it’s very fetching indeed. LOL.

  17. Ah… the Hummer. He lives again. I came across the same bloody car on my way to coast over Easter. Funny thing was, it was on the side of the road, bonnet up and a pair of legs sticking outwards…

    ‘He has been trailing me…’the gay desperado has been trailing you? And you were walking facing forwards?

    BTW, where exactly is this that the missus lives? And what time period?

  18. VituVingiSana says:

    Come on… Snipes has been dodging his taxes for years. At least he gets to pay back a lil’ bit of (post-tax)300/- I spent watching Blade 3. And it was Jessica Biel I wanted to nail, I mean stake, I mean you know what I mean.

    Blades 1+2 – Let’s just say I watched a DVD.

    I think the IRS should hire Snipes as a tax collector. With the outfit and all.

  19. edge.of.sanity says:

    Hey! Wait just one minute…

    I must confess since the haircut to feeling a tad lethargic.

    Coincidence or a Samson reference? :)

  20. Chrenyan says:

    A wise man once said “akili ni nywele”…

  21. fimbo says:

    Does auto service at kenol mean the same thing as self service?

  22. Gish says:

    Am beaming seeing that i just got the news this morning ;)
    Like mama SR, i want to see the new look.

    As one of them Meru peoples,off to fill in my profile, njust might nget rucky.

  23. Abelian says:

    Snipe should pay taxes just like everyone else, now he has time to come up with better movie scripts

  24. njege says:

    doofi. i had to check it up…nice one.

  25. savvy says:

    Been missing on this blog for a while, but I guess now am back…

    this post cracked me up…about the Hummer thing..I was watching some crappy program about americans going to remote places for a week( a reality show), and u guessed it, they came to kenya.

    so they brought a chess board for the village headman, but he wasn’t interested, he was more interested in a sealable paperbag (like those for holding dice, etc….), in the american’s words, “the sealable paper stole the show!”…

  26. savvy says:

    wait a second, u didn’t have dreadlocks? how did u look with an afro 10 years old? hope u preserved some fotos..

  27. Just learned this yesterday and was pretty amazed. A Hummer actually has better fuel economy than a Mitsubishi Pajero. Who would have thought? I thought it would be one of those that takes hundreds to fill and finishes fuel after two trips to the shop but instead it trumps Pajes…..

  28. mruhya says:

    Congrats mr. man on the hair! Never(and i mean NEVER) thought I’d see the day. the “missus” is doing u good!

  29. Ms K says:

    Heh heh the missus wins EVERY TIME!

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