I highly suspect that at Safaricom decision making is done by Michael Joseph as follows:

  • A roulette wheel of ideas, most of which are half baked is prepared
  • MJ puts on a blindfold
  • MJ is spun around in his chair 15 times by an energetic staff
  • Roulette wheel is spun
  • Dizzy MJ throws dart at spinning wheel
  • Idea struck is implemented

 blindman

This can be the only explanation for something as doofus as free calls.

FREE CALLS?

Surely you jest!

Is this the same Michael Joseph who complained bitterly about the congestion being caused by Kenyans and their ‘peculiar calling habits’?

How quickly we forget!

Have Kenyans changed overnight? Are different people inhabiting Kenya? Why didn’t I get the memo!

Thanks to the free calls (from 9 to 6) for the last week the Safaricom network, quicker than knickers in the red light district,  has been dropping completely.

The most printable of responses from Safaricom customers has been WTF. If Michael Joseph is interested in byte size bites of exactly what people think of Safaricom, he can drop me a line and I will, with the greatest of pleasure, let him know in great detail just what Safaricom is thought of, especially last week.

Safaricom may be known for many things but quality of service is not one of them. When the multitude of customers are not waiting for five loaves and two fish to be disbursed at Customer Care centers with 10+ help desks staffed by two, they are weeping and gnashing their teeth at congested networks.

And they have the temerity to offer FREE CALLS? It’s like George Bush and Lucy Kibaki offering to start a Mensa Chapter. The dang capacity ain’t there!!

And In Other Scandals

If you have not heard of kenyaipos.co.ke, then you probably live under a lichen infested rock.

When the site was launched, an initiative of Citi Group, offering Kenyans the ability to apply for shares online, like sheep we clicked the register button and proceeded to send all our personal details and share applications into the digital ether.

If you sought to read the small print you would have come away unimpressed. Nowhere was it explicitly stated what your information was used for, where it was stored and what rights you had with regards to your information.

What it did say, however, was that Citi group and all of its affiliates and partners could access and use it.

And before you ask, no, nowhere were these affiliates and partners listed.

Now, late last week someone discovered that with judicious manipulation of the URL you could pretty much view anyone else’s share applications and personal details.

Let me put that a little differently.

If you applied for your safaricom shares online anyone and I do mean anyone could have seen your personal details.

Any yahoo could have seen your phone numbers and email addresses, details of your applications and God knows what else.

In a show of the crass ineptitude that I’ve come to expect from Big Business in Kenya, the people behind kenyaipos.co.ke have simply taken the site down. There is nothing at the URL anymore.

This has the stink of a cover up.

A cover up that I am afraid will not be possible. We know about this lapse. And what’s more a few screen captures demonstrating the flaw can be tabled (suitably obfuscated of course).

In short, answers, and a full disclosure, and an apology are expected in very short order from:

Resist the temptation to cover this up. I know, I know it’s tempting. But Kenyans put their faith in many institutions and they deserve a least one of them not to make a mockery of their faith and their intelligence!

I will keep an eye on the papers and the institutional websites and hope you do the right thing.

Additional information? Threats? Drop me a line.