Can the UNDP Get Serious

The rationale behind sending our 200+ MPs to coast on some amorphous retreat ranks right up mystifies me. Completely.

I mean, let’s do some guesstimations.

There are about 210 Muppets MPs. I doubt any of these pillars of integrity will be spending two nights in a tent. Nor will they stay in a rustic bed and breakfast. These good people will expect 5, and of possible. 6 star treatment. Let’s say a room of prerequisite level of luxury, with meals is about 15,000 a night. So, for two nights the budget for the 210 Trolls MPs is 210 * 15,000 * 2 = 6,300,000.

Six million bob!

Now, we also need to get these wastrels MPs there. I don’t see them volunteering to take a Mash Auto or Coast Bus. So we will need to fly them there. A return ticket, according the Kenya Airways site, is 144$ which is about 11,520. For 210 golliwogs MPs that equates to 2,419,200.

MPs have long been accustomed to the term ‘per-diem’ and even say it in their sleep. Let us say they get 100 bucks to piss away spend wisely in case of emergencies. So for 210 garden gnomes MPs that would be 1,680,000.

And finally, they will no doubt need some sort of media kit – pens, writing pads, etc for them to purport to look busy while in fact sleeping soundly/ texting knowledgeable locals about where to find action learn.

This brings the total expenses to be about 10,399,200.


Ten million shillings.

Now the popular defence is that the UNDP is picking up the tab. This is bullshit for several reasons

  • The UN gets is money from taxpayers all over the world. Someone’s money is being pissed away either way
  • MPs can presumably speak and understand English in Nairobi (though I cannot vouch for this)
  • There are many many more pressing needs that require funding – looming famine, internally displaced Kenyans, victims of various fires

This ten million shillings is just being pissed away for no good reason. It makes no fiscal sense.

If it is in someone’s KPIs at the UNDP to piss away perfectly good money spend money and this is their way of appeasing the bean counters, I feel sorry for that institution. If they really want to piss away those funds, let them have the meeting in Nairobi and donate the excess funds to various initiatives to support the various initiatives in need to support, such as feeding the hungry or settling and supporting the IDPs.

It speaks volumes that the UNDP is willing to piss away money during a global recession!