Life in Kenya is best described as … interesting. No word quite captures the nuances of life in this wonderful country. The next best attempt was made MD of one of the leading mobile telephony provider, who famously described his clientele as ‘peculiar’ some data presented to him by his sales and marketing departments on our calling habits.

Global recessions, famine, and fallout from a chaotic and ugly electoral process aside, upon contemplating my existence in this land I love, I find that unlike many of our 53 odd neighbours, we have much to smile about.

Among the plethora of institutions funded wholly by the taxpayer is the Kenya Anti Corruption Commission, the KACC. You’d be surprised to know that the KACC is not known for slaying the hydra of corruption. The KACC, surprisingly, is better known by the fact that the Director pockets a handsome salary of 2.5 million Kenyan shillings. To aid in perspective, the president mentioned above has a salary of 2.2 million shillings, and the minimum wage is just over 7,000 shillings.

I personally would not mind contributing to this gentleman’s salary was it not for the fact that besides several flights, and the occasional flu, it is difficult to point at anything else that gentleman has caught. Pundits have loudly wondered if there would be any difference if the organization existed at all. Apprehension of the odd chicken thief and the junior policeman pocketing the odd hundred shilling note is, on the whole, not commensurate with the infrastructure and wage bill that institution has at its disposal.

Our members of parliament are some of the most highly paid in the world, all 220 or so of them. Again, I would not mind paying their handsome salaries were it not for the fact that a good number of these fine characters barely have opposable thumbs and binocular vision. Fisticuffs among our honourable members are a common occurrence.

Today I’m taking in with suspended belief the news that our President has exercised the authority of his office and with immediate effect the Police Commissioner will relinquish his duties in the police force and report for his new duties as the Postmaster General of the Postal Corporation of Kenya. I suspect that ex-army and now ex-policeman will find that the bullets in letters are dealt with somewhat differently.

I’m reminded of the day of the national budget, when our worthy finance minister attempted to contain his cabinet colleagues by issuing a decree that all official vehicles have a capacity not greater than 1800 cc. This news was received with stunned amazement by the honourable members who loudly inquired how they were supposed to drive on the terrible roads with small cars. One minister loudly complained that the thought of driving the same vehicle as a teenager was inconsistent with his dignity as a cabinet minister and a human being as a whole.

Going back to our head of state, it is unanimously agreed that worthy leader adopts a famously laissez faire attitude towards the execution of his duties. In fact there are two schools of thought, one that fronts his belief in infrastructure and delegation of duties and the other of the opinion the Commander In Chief of our armed forces has an acute disinclination to work.

What impresses both camps is that when it comes to enumerating the members of the first family, His Excellency’s enthusiasm and verve is second to none. To put this into context, there has long been speculation of an unofficial second occupant of the office of the first lady. This speculation has not been kindly received by the official occupant of said office. The sight of the powerful man able to declare war on friends and foe reading the names of his spouse (one) and offspring is not one that comes often.

Much has been said about the unfortunate events of the 2007 elections. The democratic process has much to be proud of when a constituency has an impressive voter turnout of 120%. The chairman of Electoral Commission of Kenya, while reading such logistic discrepancies, had a cherubic mien as he read out remarkable statistics like in a region with 100,000 registered voters, 120,000 votes were cast.

The results of that process led to an unwilling coalition of bedfellows, with an incumbent president retaining office, a third place finisher who finished so far behind as to be first in the 2012 elections taking office as Vice President and the second placed finisher being sworn in as Prime Minister. With close to 40 ministers, taking minutes at Cabinet meetings is not work for the faint at heart. With close to 40 ministers, those who don’t quite understand the logistic difficulties faced in the construction of the Tower Of Babel are invited to observe the operations of the Kenyan cabinet.

Yes, there is plenty to smile about.